The Origin and Purpose of Family

Jim Davis

Moses gives an over view of the creation of man and woman in the following verse:

Genesis 1:26
Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground." (NIV)

God had a purpose for creating humans. God created humans as the objects of his love. However, his love was not without purpose for God created humans to replenish the earth.

Genesis 1:27-28
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it." (NIV)

As Moses continues with his account of creation, he gives us a more detailed account of the timing of God's creation. It seems that God created everything in perfect order. After God created the heavens and the earth, then he created man. After creating man, God planted a garden for man to till. Then God placed Adam in the garden he had planted in the east at Eden. God placed Adam in Eden to work it and take care of it.

Initially Adam is all alone and "The LORD God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.'" (Genesis 2:18 NIV) But before God creates Eve he instructs Adam to name each living creature on the earth. When Adam had completed this task the Genesis text says, "But for Adam no suitable helper was found." (Genesis 3:20)

Before God created Adam's female counter he wanted Adam to see his own deep need of companionship. The process of naming all the animals and seeing that all of them had mates made Adam sense his great need for companionship. Adam no doubt felt his aloneness. When Adam senses his own deep-need God creates woman.

It is at this juncture that God initiates family life.

Genesis 2:21-25
So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman,' for she was taken out of man." For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame. (NIV)

In Luke's account of the genealogy of Jesus Christ Luke calls Adam the son of God. (Luke 3:38) God created the human race to be his very own children.

Family is the Foundation of Society

In the very beginning God provided foundational guidelines for the family that would keep it solid and keep it strong. In the very beginning God spelled out the primary principles for domestic health and happiness. This was before civil government, law, school or even the church. The home had top priority in God's mind. The foundation of society began with the home. God created everything in an orderly fashion as he put first things first. The home was primary in the establishment of society. The home is the basic building block of all human relationships.

Regardless of what society does to minimize the home, the home continues to be the primary building block of society. So goes the home, so goes society. Sometimes we think it is the other way around. Ultimately, the home still has the power to change society. Think of what did through godly Abraham and Sarah. Think of how God changed through Joseph and Mary’s home. God has done great done things and will continue to do great things through the influence of the home.

God said, " For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame." (Genesis 2:26-27)

Four basic principles for every home are found within these two verses.

Severance "leave his father and . . . mother"
Permanence "cleave to his wife"
Unity "they shall become one flesh"
Intimacy "both naked and were not ashamed"

There is a very basic principle that must be recognized before these four basic principles find real meaning. You might overlook this basic principle if you focus only on Genesis 2:26-27. It is found in the following verses:

Genesis 2:15-17
The LORD God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it. And the LORD God commanded the man, "You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die." (NIV)

Obedience to God is the basic principle of all life. The basic principle of the home is spiritual in nature. It was established before as the foundation of Adam's life before he had a wife. Obedience to God was the foundational of God's original family in Eden. Without observing this basic principle life deteriorates. Notice the following verses.

Genesis 3:6-7
When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves. (NIV)

It was Satan's intention to destroy God's creation through his attack on the home. Satan's attack in Eden was more far reaching than most want to imagine. To accomplish his purpose he attacked the sacred intimacy of the home. He sought to destroy the very foundation upon which a society is built. If you read the first six chapters of Genesis, you realize that it was a very effective strategy. Nothing is more destructive to society than a divided home. The consequences of a divided home are seen in the lives of Cain and Abel.

Genesis 4:8-11
Now Cain said to his brother Abel, "Let's go out to the field." And while they were in the field, Cain attacked his brother Abel and killed him. Then the LORD said to Cain, "Where is your brother Abel?" "I don't know," he replied. "Am I my brother's keeper?" The LORD said, "What have you done? Listen! Your brother's blood cries out to me from the ground. Now you are under a curse and driven from the ground, which opened its mouth to receive your brother's blood from your hand. (NIV)

When I look to God's family in Eden I realize that the best efforts of parents want always prevent children from going astray. It wasn't that God failed.

Spiritual Instruction Essential

The spiritual lives of mom and dad are the foundational principles for the lives of the children. Observe Moses' commands.

Deuteronomy 4:9
Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them. (NIV)

We may look at teaching as a lecture to be given to our children, but it has more to do with how we live. It has to do with not allowing God's principles to slip from our own hearts.

Deuteronomy 6:5-9
Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates. (NIV)

When God's commands are upon the hearts of the parents the children will observe them in our travels, when we lie down to sleep and whey we get up. This simply that our children will be able to observe them in the normal walks of life. Allowing the children to observe how these principles work in our lives will create their desire to know the instruction of the Lord.

Of course children do not catch our zeal for the Lord without instruction. However, instruction must come those who are seeking to practice God's instructions. Children must be instructed as to why the parents live the way they live. They need to know the ethics you practice are found in God's principles for living. The instruction Moses is speaking of is the kind of instruction that informs your sons about God and how his instructions affect how you live. Don't take for granted that they know why you make the choices you make.

This instruction is done from the mutual respect of children and parents. Mutual respect requires both the parents and the children to seek obedience to God. Parents must practice what they preach. Our children need proper instruction, but they need the instruction given with a proper attitude.

Ephesians 6:1-4
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and mother"-- which is the first commandment with a promise--"that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth." Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. (NIV)

What really exasperates the home is to preach what the children should be doing without practicing those principles in your own life. Teaching must go beyond theology and become authentic as it takes root in our hearts for the purpose of guiding our lives.

Our children live in a hostile world. Just look at the schools across the nation. Satan's influence on their lives is real. There is also a nature within our children that must be tamed and brought into obedience to God. David writes, "Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me." (Psalms 51:5 NIV) Our natural birth has instilled a sinful nature. We are born with a sinful nature. There is a sinful nature passed on from birth. In Adam all are dead spiritually.

Psalms 58:2-3
No, in your heart you devise injustice, and your hands mete out violence on the earth. Even from birth the wicked go astray; from the womb they are wayward and speak lies. (NIV)

This is all the more reason to instruct our children in the ways of the Lord. That little baby looks so innocent, sweet and adorable at birth, but it isn't long before it demonstrates its sinful nature. Have you noticed how cruel kids are to one another?

Dr. Albert Siegel said:

When it comes to rearing children, every society is only 20 years away from barbarianism. Twenty years is all we have to accomplish the task of civilizing the infants who are born into our midst each year. These savages know nothing of our language, our culture, our religion, our values, or our customs of interpersonal relations. The infant is totally ignorant about communism, fascism, democracy, civil liberties, and the rights of the minority as contrasted with the prerogatives of the majority, respect, decency, honesty, customs conventions, and manners. The barbarian must be tamed if civilization is to survive. (Quoted from Charles Swindol, Family Life, Multnomah Press. Page 102.)

The Minnesota Crime commission released a report a number of years ago which sounds a lot like Dr. Siegel's warning:

"Every baby starts life as a little savage. He is completely selfish and self-centered. He wants what he wants when he wants it: a bottle, the mother's attention, his playmate's toy, and his uncle's watch. Deny these and the baby seethes with rage and aggressiveness, which would be murderous, were the baby not so helpless. This means that all children, not just certain children, are born delinquent. If permitted to continue in the self-centered world of infancy, given free reign to impulsive actions, every child would grow up a criminal, a thief, a killer a rapist." (Quoted from Charles Swindol, Family Life, Multnomah Press. Page 102.)

We see this exemplified in the first family on earth as Cain murders his brother.

Now, as parents, there is a short time, when we think our children are perfect. That moment doesn't last long. When you see a parent in that mode, just smile and nod and agree, because that moment so short lived. Let them enjoy it. Here are some tips, for those of you who think your children are perfect. These should be used as clues that your children may have some flaws:

1. Your child gets extra credit from his/her teacher for being absent

2. Your neighbors always have their cement poured while your family is on vacation.

3. You find the phone off the hook and the mailbox in his room under his bed.

4. You are shopping with your children and a clerk gives you a flyer from the store across the street.

So many Children are spoiled because parents can't spank Grandma.

A mother was telling about her three boys. "My boys are very loyal to each other. When one of them misbehaves, the others will not tell on him." Her friend asked, "How do you know which one to punish then?" It's not too hard" she said. "When one of them does something wrong, we send all three to bed without supper or TV. Then next morning we spank the one with the black eye."

Conclusion:

No one will ever have a greater influence on your children than you. That is why you must lead the family spiritual. That doesn't mean that children want stray, but that is their best possible chance of knowing the Lord. We see this kind of influence throughout the New Testament.

Acts 16:29-34
The jailer called for lights, rushed in and fell trembling before Paul and Silas. He then brought them out and asked, "Sirs, what must I do to be saved?" They replied, "Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved-- you and your household." Then they spoke the word of the Lord to him and to all the others in his house. At that hour of the night the jailer took them and washed their wounds; then immediately he and all his family were baptized. The jailer brought them into his house and set a meal before them; he was filled with joy because he had come to believe in God-- he and his whole family. (NIV)

We also see this kind of influence in Cornelius' family as he brought his family together to what Peter was to teach him about the Lord.

Acts 10:33
So I sent for you immediately, and it was good of you to come. Now we are all here in the presence of God to listen to everything the Lord has commanded you to tell us." (NIV)

This is the purpose of families. Families need spiritual teaching that only parents can provide.

In age when the family is minimized, maybe we need to remember Mr. & Mrs. Noah’s heroic efforts to save their family. Because of them we are here today.